Manager Wanted: Little or No Experience Wanted

I am disappointed I missed the ad in all the major newspapers and baseball trade papers. It must have read something like this:

The St. Louis Cardinals and Chicago White Sox have a position open for team manager at the major league level.  No experience necessary at any level. First come, first served as the need is quite urgent.  The Chicago Cubs have a vacancy as well.  Applicants should have a few days of experience but not be considered a viable candidate by any other major league team.  The Boston Red Sox wish to interview every potential candidate but are not seriously interested in hiring anyone at this time.

How could I have missed such an ad?  Which of us hasn’t thought we could do a better job of running a baseball game than those currently employed in such a position? Finally I would have had an opportunity at the major league level for a position of authority in which my qualifications were perfect, except maybe for the Cub opening.  What a chance I missed.

Only the manager’s chair in Boston seems to be still open to me.  The only drawback for that position seems to be that I really wouldn’t be working or drawing a salary. But then again, I do have experience in both categories in the past. There have been times years ago where I was in just such a position. I believe, if memory serves, it was when I was unemployed. If I can find one of my old resumes, I am sure that the Boston Red Sox management would be quite impressed by my skillful adaptation to any unemployment situation which might have presented itself to me at the time.  I will admit that it’s been quite some time since I have not worked in that particular field but I am sure I could quickly recall my experiences.

The city of Chicago had two openings, sadly only one of which I was qualified.  The Cubs would not have hired my services as I have no experience managing at the major league level.  But I do qualify as a person which no other team would want if I did indeed have that experience. I wonder if second-guessing managerial moves in front of my television screen could be counted and should be included on my resume. Through the beauty of hindsight, I have not made one mistake in managing a major league game for over 40 years now.

I was qualified, if not over-qualified, for the managerial openings on the Southside of Chicago and in St. Louis.  I say over-qualified because many years ago, I coached a Little League game. The White Sox and Cardinals have concluded that the years of experience by their respective minor league coaches and managers are the wrong approach. These teams have decided  that the years of experience by coaches at the major league levels and past insistence on knowing how to not only run a game properly but also dealing with 25 different personalities should have no place in baseball.

I should add that I won that Little League game, and I remain to this day undefeated. I proved then that experience can be a hindrance and an out-and-out undesirable qualification in the quest for a championship. If only I had seen the want ad in time. My wife and I might be planning a spring trip, all expenses paid, to Florida come March.

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